This past week I had the opportunity to speak to about 70 parents at a private college prep high school.  The anxiety level in the room was moderately high because these parents were there to hear answers about how to get their students to take seriously the process of finding a career path and choosing a college to attend.

Earlier this fall, I wrote an entry on anxiety – understanding it and strategies for managing it, so I won’t repeat those principles here.  But I had a number of parents comment afterwards that limiting the amount of future they think about was a helpful concept to them.

I continue to “preach” the concept that a student’s career path is the combination of understanding themselves (their abilities, interests, personality style, etc.) and knowledge about the world of work. And I fully believe that we continually overemphasize the individual aspect of the equation. In fact, (although it is a bit of an over-statement) I have come to believe that it really doesn’t matter what a student wants to do.  Ask anyone one of the tens of thousands of individuals who have been laid off, furloughed or who can’t find work.

The issue isn’t “what do I want to do” but “what goods or services are needed that people are willing to pay for“?   As a culture, we have forgotten that the primary purpose of a career is to provide financially for ourselves and our family.  This is accomplished by providing a service (either customers or an employer) that someone needs and is willing to pay for — and obviously, that we are qualified to provide.

There are thousands of people who right now aren’t working in their primary career field.  They aren’t doing what they went to college to study.  But they have their current job because “it pays the bills”.  This is a reality that many young people don’t fully understand  (or haven’t until recently).

So, the point is:  young people today need to focus more on learning about the world of work, and less on what they are interested in doing.  (Hopefully, they will find a career path that meets this desire, but it is the secondary issue.)  They need to find out “what is out there” — what jobs and careers exist, what do you really do in them, and what the current and future needs are.

To press the point further, it isn’t that helpful to know that you are good with numbers, like animals, are introverted, and have the resources to go to college if you don’t know what career paths match these characteristics, what course of study is needed, and what the needs are for the future.

So how does a student learn about the world of work? Being blunt — by working.  Not by taking “Introduction to [Psychology, Veterinary Science, Computer Science, Elementary Education, insert your area of interest here]”.  Not by going to a lot of fun camps.  Not by playing sports all summer, every summer from junior high through high school.   I have written previously on the importance of work experience for college graduates seeking employment.  And after my presentation this past week, I had a large number of business owners and managers approach me, saying, “That part about students needing to work — I couldn’t agree with you more.  Keep saying it.”

There are lots of opportunities for students to learn about the world of work:  part-time jobs, summer jobs, shadowing, interviewing professionals, talking to college professors in your area of interest, talking to older friends (say, friends of your older sibling) about their experiences, and volunteering.

Generally speaking, I think parents should focus less on SAT & ACT prep courses (although they can make a big difference in scholarship awards) and more on their students getting some work experience.  Getting into the college of your choice doesn’t matter much if you don’t have a clue what you are going to study.  After all, we do know what academic success predicts, don’t we?  Academic success at the next level.  Academic success, in itself, has little predictive validity for career success. (There are a lot of successful students who don’t learn the skills necessary to succeed in the world of work — a topic for another entry sometime.)

Why am I “hammering” this issue of work so hard?  Because I am seeing lots and lots of young adults who were great kids and teens, who did well in school, had fun in high school (and college), who didn’t work much — and who are virtually lost in their career direction because they don’t know what is “out there” in the world of work, and they don’t know how to find out.

Hopefully, my message will help you and your student avoid this unpleasant pathway.  If I can be of help, let me know.  I am doing more and more career coaching for young adults to help them find out what is “out there” and develop a plan to figure out their career path (many of these are long distance, by telephone or video conference.)

Have a good week!

When I talk to parents, either in family meetings, counseling sessions, or lectures, I always describe one of the main goals of parenting is: “to raise independent functional adults”.  First, you try to keep them alive so that they will at least become an adult (e.g. avoiding fatal car accidents as teens).  Secondly, you want them to move toward independence, versus being eternally dependent on you.  And finally, you want them to be”functional” in terms of having the character qualities necessary to function in the world (learning lessons like: work comes before play; there is a relationship between responsibility and privilege; life is made of choices, with accompanying results; there are limited resources in life [time,money, energy] so you have to prioritize — “You can’t do everything.”)

As parents, there are milestones along the way that show that your kids are on the right path (graduating from high school, getting a job and paying for some of their expenses, living away from home after college).  And there are “ditches” to avoid as well — drug and alcohol addiction, serious credit card debt, inability to hold down a job over time.

Ultimately, when do you claim “victory!” as a parent?  When can you say, “I think we were pretty successful as parents”?  Being somewhat hard-nosed, but also truthful, I don’t think we really know how we did as parents until our grandchildren are young adults and displaying the characteristics we value.  That is a long time off, but just like many other areas of life, I don’t think true success can be claimed until the first generation results are replicated.

Nonetheless, I think there are times (and this is one for us), where you can at least stop, take a breath, and claim temporary victory.

My wife, Kathy, and I are in the midst of a significant life transition. For the first time in 26 years and 3 months, we don’t have any of our children living at home.  Our oldest two (twin sons, Daniel & Nathan) have both graduated from college and have been out own their own for a few years.  One is a chaplain in the Army and being deployed to Iraq in a few weeks (for 12 months).  One is involved in international medical relief work and currently is in Liberia (for just a short time).  Our third son, Joel, graduated with a degree in mechanical engineering in May and is going back for a masters degree in biomedical engineering (with a full ride scholarship and teaching assistantship position.)  And our daughter, Elizabeth, just moved into her dorm room at college, after graduating from high school this spring.

Are we proud?  Absolutely.  Is the role of parenting over and we can claim complete success?  Definitely not.  But you have to stop at some points in life and rejoice in the progress made so far.

But with the pride also comes pain.  Being successful as parents, raising “independent functional adults” (plus some other character qualities, also involves a fair amount of loss.  Let me outline some of the losses we are experiencing:

• Loss of communication. When kids move away, they aren’t there for dinner anymore (not as often, at least).  You don’t see them before they go to school, or when they come home in the evenings.  The opportunity for daily life small interactions diminishes significantly.
• Loss of connectivity.  Once they are out of the home (and gradually before then) they are living their own lives.  They have their own activities (which you generally don’t attend like you did their soccer games or school concerts).  They get to know lots of people you don’t know.  Your lives become more separate and less connected (which is good and necessary, but still hurts sometimes.)
• Loss of being needed on a daily basis.  Many parents are actively involved in their children’s lives daily for years and decades.  Moms who have the privilege of being at home with the children before the school years are especially attuned to this issue.  At different stages in life, this issue becomes more poignant — when your oldest goes to their first day of school; when each child leaves to go to college; and when your youngest moves out.
• Loss of role and identity.  Closely related to the “not being needed on a daily basis” issue, is the loss of role and identity which can also occur.  Some of us, as parents, seeing being a parent as one our primary roles and callings in life.  When the more active stage of in-home parenting is over, the question: “What do I do with my time and energy now?” can come to the forefront.
• Loss of togetherness.  As your children get older, it is tougher to get time together as a total family.  We have experienced this (this last week five of us got together for a family vacation, but Daniel couldn’t make it since he is in Liberia), but have been able to have brief flecks of time all together.  Family gatherings without everyone there is bittersweet — you enjoy the time with whoever can make it, but you also have a sense of lack of completeness when one or more are missing.

When we talk with friends whose children are younger than ours, they often say:  “I don’t know if I will be able to survive that.”  But, like lots of life, you somehow get ready for the next stage by the time you get there.  The transitions are tough, and painful (for us, at least).  But the accompanying pride, joy of seeing your children “fly” on their own, and the wonder about the opportunities before you dampen the pain somewhat.

We’ll see what’s next!

This past week I had the privilege in being involved in a number of school graduation ceremonies, in different roles.  I had a daughter who graduated from high school (along with all of the receptions involved).  I had a son who graduated from college, but who didn’t “walk” — not because he didn’t want to, but because he is pursuing a masters and the two degrees are tied together.  I had a number of my friends whose teenagers and young adults graduated, so we are going through the journey simultaneously.  And I had a number of teens and young adults whom I consider to be friends of mine who graduated.

It is interesting to me to observe the different perspectives different age groups bring to the graduation process.  (Although the following observations are broad generalizations, I think they are true for many in each age group.)

• High School graduates seem to be largely focused on “getting done”.  They view the process of completing high school as a significant long term task to complete — it is the culmination of twelve (or more) years of elementary and secondary education.  Given that most high school students are looking toward college or some other form of further training, they often are looking forward to the future with anticipation (mixed with some anxiety, depending on the student).
• College graduates are glad to be done, for sure.  But they more typically are facing the harsh realities of “real life” — trying to find a job, determining the next steps in their lives (not only where they will work, but where they will live).  There generally seems to be a deeper sense of accomplishment than with high school graduates, as it should be.  Some college grads busted through in four (sometimes three) years, while others took five years.  For others, it truly has been a long term goal stretched over several years or decades.  College graduates seem to exude a deep appreciation along with a measured hope for the future.
• Older family members (aunts, uncles, grandparents, older siblings) usually are filled with pride for the accomplishment of the younger family member.  Their experience seems to be mellower, just enjoying the moment and appreciating the time together with family.  With older siblings there is a fair amount of teasing of their younger brothers and sisters, in a good natured way, but one which also seems to communicate “Don’t get too stuck on yourself.  There’s more life to conquer.”
• Parents are the ones who seem to experience the widest range of feelings and emotions — pride, relief, sadness, anxiety about the future, gratefulness for one less tuition payment.  And reflection.  In listening to many parents’ conversations, they often are reflective on the past few years’ life experiences, and sometimes on the child’s entire lifetime.

Interestingly, it is this process of reflection that has caught my attention.  Both for myself, for other friends who are parents, and for many family members (aunts, uncles, siblings, grandparents), graduation ceremonies and the traditions which accompany them seem to bring back numerous memories.  These memories include their own graduation and school experiences, prior family members’ graduations, and their life experiences with the graduate.

Not an earthshaking observation, but it does seem that “ceremonies” help mark points in time.  Graduations, weddings, anniversaries, birthday parties — all provide a memory touchstone that we can connect memories, feelings, and lessons of life to.

And this can be a great starting point for meaningful conversations with others.  Questions like:  “Grandma, what was your high school graduation like?”   Or, “What do you remember about your college graduation?” can be great ways to learn more deeply about those you love.

For me, the graduation time has been a helpful reminder to ask myself:

a) Am I investing my time and energy into those activities and relationships that I really want to — that are most important to me?   and

b) What do I want (and need) to do to continue to build the relationships that I want to keep close and growing?

A lesson I have learned from having three of our four children move into young adulthood — maintaining and growing relationships with young adults takes time, perseverance, and commitment.  You no longer have “dinner time” to catch up on the day’s activities and you don’t tend to have them in the car as much just running errands together and chatting.  So I am in the midst of planning how to maintain and build the relationships with all four of my young adult children as they move into new phases of their lives.

It seems like colleges start earlier and earlier each year — but in the Midwest, at least, a number of colleges and universities started this past week or will this coming week (I know many schools back East and on the West Coast start after Labor Day). And with the beginning of the fall semester comes the transition for thousands of students from high school to college. Currently, I am working with a number of families and I have several friends who have students in this life stage.

Given that I went to college for ten years (four years bachelors, two years masters, and four years of doctoral coursework) and that I have taught undergraduate and graduate level courses, I think I am pretty qualified to talk about those behaviors that lead to success in the classroom. So let’s look at habits and choices which lead to academic success in college.

1. Go to class (and show up at least five minutes early). This is a no-brainer, but many students who are transitioning from high school are looking forward to the “freedom” of college — that they don’t “have to” go to class and no one is checking up on them. Successful students go to class. And showing up early does a number of things — it allows some for something to go wrong and still get to class on time, it shows the teacher class is important to you and you want to hear everything they have to say, it provides the opportunity to interact with other students and build some friendships, and it prevents you from coming in late to class, interrupting the instructor and irritating them (not good if you are on the bubble at the end of the semester between a C/B or B/A).

2. Stay awake in class and pay attention. Going to class and sleeping is little better (and for irritating the instructor, its worse) than not going to class. So this means you either need to get enough sleep (a major challenge for many college students) or loading yourself with enough caffeine to stay awake. Take a hint from an instructor — what the professor says in class is what is important to them about the topic and is much more likely to be on the exam. Plus, if you use the words and language the instructor does, you are more likely to get points on an exam.

3. Keep current in your reading. Besides not going to class regularly (especially those 8 a.m. “gen ed” classes), getting behind in your reading assignments is probably the next big error students make. A professor’s lectures are usually focused on the reading for the day — so to get the maximum benefit of the lecture, it is helpful to have some idea what she or he is talking about. In high school you may have been able to coast and just get the material from the lectures; in college, trying to learn without doing the reading is asking for trouble [trust me, you can believe me now or you can believe me after you get your first D or F in your life on an exam.]

4. Review your class notes at least once a week. (For those students who are really serious about learning, review and correct/clarify your notes after each class.) Exams will cover and emphasize material covered in class. Keeping familiar with the information and reviewing it periodically will make it significantly easier to remember for tests (as opposed to cramming 20 pages of notes the night before the exam). This habit is probably the one that will be new to most students, and also which will be most helpful. Many tests in college are not just “regurgitate the material”; they ask you to think about and synthesize the concepts. So to be able to do this, you have to know the basic information “cold”. For example, instructors are no longer going to ask you to “cite the four major political events leading up to the Civil War” but they may ask you to “compare the major political events which led to the Civil War with parallel political issues in our culture today.” If you have trouble remembering the facts, you will struggle with coming up with an answer that makes sense.

5. Take care of yourself — physically, socially and emotionally. Sleep deprivation + eating mainly junk food (with no fruits or vegetables) + no exercise = foggy thinking, poor memory and a high likelihood of getting sick or depressed. Studying all the time (or playing computer games by yourself for hours) and never hanging out with friends leads to not having friends, being viewed as weird, and loneliness — increasing the potential (significantly) for you dropping out of school. You don’t have a mom around anymore (hopefully!) — telling you to go to bed, fixing vegetables at every meal, and making you turn off the computer and go outside. If you don’t take care of you, no one will.

6. Study in ways that maximize your time and effort. Research demonstrates that most people’s core attention span and ability to focus is between 10 minutes and 20-25 minutes after they started studying. The first 10 minutes is sort of “warm up” where you are getting into the material. The next 10-15 minutes are high intensity concentration. Then your ability to concentrate and learn wanes. Usually, after 30 minutes on a subject (e.g. reading history), your learning impact is low and you are wasting time. To maximize your study time, it is best to break your study sessions into 30 minute segments. Study subject A (history) for the first 30 minutes. Then switch not only subjects but the type of task (e.g. do math problems) for the next 30 minutes. Take a 5 minute (not 15, 30 or 60 minute) break — get up, walk around, get a drink, go to the bathroom. Then do two more subjects, for 30 minutes each. THEN take a longer break — go get some exercise, eat a meal, hang out with friends. This approach to studying will help you accomplish a lot more than studying the same subject for 60, 90 or 120 minutes at a time.

So, there you have it. If you want to do well academically in college, go to class, pay attention, keep up in your reading, review your notes, take care of yourself physically, and study in short segments. As a professional learner, if you do practice these six habits, I guarantee you will maximize your opportunity for success (I would feel dishonest in guaranteeing pure “success”).

p.s. I do have other tips for taking tests which I can share later in the semester.

Recently, I am working with more and more young adults who are finding it difficult to find jobs in their desired career path. And it doesn’t really matter what area they are in – business, education, computer science, marketing, graphic design. Some are recent college graduates (as in 2007), while others have been out of school for a while. Some of these individuals have taken short-term (e.g. one or two year) positions and now they want to ”move on” in their career. And I am hearing reports back from numerous young people across the country that “finding a job is “harder than I thought it would be.”

Interestingly, I am finding flecks of this theme in various articles and books. One nationally syndicated newspaper column, entitled “How Liberal Arts Grads Can Find a Good Career” encourages liberal arts students to “think beyond grades” and to get involved in internships, either paid or unpaid. Probably good advice, but it usually falls on deaf ears – the college environment screams the importance of grades to students and many liberal arts colleges don’t provide much assistance in landing internships. Besides, once you have graduated, it’s a little late to work on these issues.

In her book, Generation Me: Why Today’s Young Americans Are More Confident, Assertive, Entitled – and More Miserable Than Ever Before, Dr. Jean Twenge ( psychologist) states that “more and more young people in their twenties will be disappointed that they cannot pursue their chosen profession.” She states young people are starving for good advice in career paths. Partly, she believes because although young adults are goal oriented they really don’t have realistic ideas of how to achieve their goals. As Adam (age 22) stated, “ Getting a degree does not guarantee a stable job.”

Another column put out recently by the Cox News service, was entitled, “Boomer Parents Hover Even in Kids’ Job Hunts”. The author, Tammy Joyner, reports that some parents of young adults who are applying for jobs are: a) trying to sit in on their children’s job interviews; b) rescheduling interviews for their child applicant: and c) calling prospective employers to find out the status of the job offer or d) asking why their child didn’t get the job!

OK, so what seems to be the problem here? Well, I think there are a number of factors that are contributing to the challenge of young college graduates being able to find a job:

1. Employers are looking for someone who has practical work experience, not just academic training. Most employers I talk to would rather hire a person who is not a college graduate but who has some practical work experience in the industry, rather than a college graduate with no experience (aside from coursework).

2. Young people today tend to believe that external fators (luck, chance,) have more to do with life success than personal effort. (See Dr. Twenge’s book for research that documents this viewpoint) As a result, they tend to “wait to see what happens” rather than be proactive in their application process.

3. Young people tend to have unrealistic expectations about the world of work (and it is not all their fault). They have been told for years that they are smart, great, brilliant and anyone would be lucky to hire them (welcome to the results of self-esteem training).

They also typically haven’t worked much and expect a higher paying position and higher level job than their experienced warrants. So they often are offended (or at least, not interested) in some “lower level” jobs offered to them.

So my advice to young people who are looking for jobs today includes:

A. Do something. The default for many in this generation is to be passive and “wait”. Time will get you nowhere without action. Put in applications (in person), call on jobs in the newspaper, send in your resume to monster.com This does a couple of things – it lowers your anxiety level, and it lowers your parents’ anxiety level. And it increases the probability of you finding a job.

B. Talk to people. Networking is still the best way to find a job. Talk to people (not just your friends) – adults in the work world. Tell them you are looking for work. Ask them if they know anyone you should talk to (just someone in the field, not just someone who is looking to hire.) Talk to your parents’ friends, call people, visit them at their workplace, or meet them for lunch.

C. Get some kind of paying job – any job. The world has changed. It no longer looks bad to take a “scut” job that is not related to your career field (this is true for most young adults starting out, but not for older adults who are already in their career). Employers want to know that you are willing to work. Most employers will be impressed that you are working part-time at Starbucks just to pay the bills or you have a full-time position at Best Buy while you are looking for a “real job”. They understand the financial demands you are facing and you will gain “points” in their minds for being responsible and proactive.

D. Be willing to take a job in your career field that you think is “beneath” you. In a recent article in Fortune magazine, James Bell, the CFO of Boeing, Inc. states, “ A lot of young people think they know a lot more than they really know.” Many companies are willing to hire college graduates in entry level positions and quickly move them up the ranks as they show competence and willingness to work hard. A word of advice: don’t expect to be offered a position where you are supervising others, until you have proven yourself first.

E. Have a plan and work it. It doesn’t have to be a grand, master plan – just a plan for the week: who you are going to call, where you are going to apply, who you are going to meet with. The key to success is twofold: persevere and always ask people if they know someone you should talk to – and do it.

Our culture is information saturated.  In fact, I would say many of us are information addicts.  We think we need to know more, or at least the latest information, before we make a decision or act.  The problem is — there is so much information available and it is coming at us so quickly, we really can’t know everything on a specific topic. 

In thinking about why we feel we need so much information, I reflect on a parenting principle I often share with families.  Children are not in control of much in their lives (especially younger children).  We pick where they live, make their meals, buy their clothes, and dictate how much of their time is used.  But people of all ages like to feel they are in control of their lives.  One way children gain a sense of control in their lives is through predictability.  They tend to do better when there is a pattern of routine in their lives which gives them a general ability to predict what is going to happen — around mealtime (when/where they eat), bedtime, a favorite TV show they watch, or what the family does on Saturday mornings.  They really aren’t in control but they have the illusion of control through predictability.  This is fine and actually healthy.

I believe a similar dynamic may occur as we get older.  I believe the rapid changes in our world create an overall anxiety in our lives — we are less able to predict what life will be like because so much is changing so fast.  Gasoline prices fluctuate, our favorite restaurant goes out of business, our son or daughter gets a new job and is moving out of town, our largest customer is bought by another company and may not continue to buy from us, there are new cell phones and service options coming out monthly, the capabilities of digital cameras increase every few months.  And on it goes.

One way we try to manage this change (and our anxiety — that is, our fear of making a mistake) is to keep informed — listen to the news on the radio, visit our favorite news website at least 2-3 times a day, read our mail/email/newspaper/magazines/professional journals, watch the “talking heads” on TV at night, search the Web for the latest reviews on products.  And, to a point, this is appropriate.

However, in working with individuals, business managers, and families, I find many people become paralyzed in making decisions or moving forward with a plan of action because they are constantly re-evaluating the situation and feel driven to gather more information.   At some point, though, enough is enough.

I think we need to be asking ourselves some questions, to help us determine if we need more information, and if so, how much more information we need, and where we will gather the information (to make sure it is accurate, an increasing problem in our information overloaded world.)

If you find yourself (or one of your colleagues) continuing to put off making a decision or taking an action step because “we need to get some more information first”, I would encourage you to ask yourself the following questions:

1) What more information do I need, really?  What specifically do I need to know that I don’t know now?  How will having this information affect my decision (or will it)?

2) What information do I need just to start the process? (Often the plan of action is a series of steps, and more information will actually be gathered along the way as you go through the process.  Usually, it is impossible to gather all of the information desired up front, because the data will change depending upon decisions made in the process.)

3) What are the risks (realistically) of proceeding with 80% of the information (versus having 90%+)?

4) What, besides my perceived need for more information, is prohibiting me from moving forward in achieving my goal? 

Potential factors:  fear of making a wrong decision, letting the “urgent” details of daily life squeeze out the “important”, really not wanting to deal with the issue, fear of conflict which may result from the decision.

Let me give you some practical areas where I see this issue raise its ugly head:

  a) staffing decisions.  Needing to hire for a new position, or more frequently, procrastinating in letting go someone who is not good for the business.

  b) long-term planning decisions.  Sitting down and starting to put together your personal estate/wealth transfer plan.  Avoiding making decisions about business succession - both ownership succession and management succession.

  c) personal career direction. What college should I go to?  What major should I choose?  Should I change career directions and pursue another area of interest?  Should I really start looking for another company to work for?  Should I get some training in another area because my current job is a dead-end?

  I am sure there are lots of other areas where this issue applies.  The key question I think we need to keep asking ourselves is:  What more information do I need, really?

As I said in today’s earlier blog, the issue of college costs will continue to be a point of discussion. And so the evidence comes. The lead cover story for today’s (11/14/2006) USA Today addresses the need to have measurable indicators of the benefits of a college education – and the reaction to this from the educational establishment. The issue is that of trying to evaluate the comparative value of different college’s education in comparison to their costs.

U.S. Education Secretary Margaret Spellings wants students and parents to be able to compare the value of a college education and used the analogy of gathering data when shopping for a car. However, one university president bristled, stating that the value of college can’t be quantified – it is more like choosing a spouse.

Nonetheless, some interesting data is presented in the article.

*For every 100 ninth-graders in school:

There is then much data thrown around regarding:

For me, the “take away’s” are the following:

1. Let the buyer beware. You may not get what you think you are paying for.
2. Don’t base your financial decisions on the assumption that your student will complete college in four years. This is the exception rather than the rule.
3. We need to broaden our thinking about career development. The equation: “College degree = Professional career” is far from an automatic result today.

I continue to argue that the best career preparation young adults can be doing today involves working (anywhere possible), talking to professionals in areas you are interested, do volunteer work or internships in career areas you are considering. These steps will help sharpen your focus and decision-making for career direction far more than taking an introductory survey course in your field.

A very frequent topic of discussion, books and articles today is the question: “Is the cost of college worth the investment?” Often proponents cite historical data of the cumulative increase in income a college graduate earns over their career in comparison to high school graduates.

This then leads to a variety of issues addressing variations or derivatives of the global issue, such as the high cost of private colleges and arguments that state colleges are a better value, or rebuttals that private colleges provide more “value” and the real cost for graduates isn’t that different (partly because many students attending public universities take five years to complete, while private college students are more likely to complete in four years.)

Another related topic is that of debt – whether parents or students should fund college education by taking out loans. Dave Ramsey, a conservative popular financial advisor, strongly opposes this path. Others such as Eileen Gallo, who advises wealthy families, comes from a different point of view – discussing whether wealthy parents should pay for all of their students’ college education or not. And then there are the rest of us who value higher education, and are asking, not if, but: “How much debt should we (or our child) take on?”

I believe this discussion will continue for several years. And the questions are not easy to answer. The problem is: I believe, that we are asking the wrong questions (at least, initially).

Anytime a question of “value” or “worth” is being raised, there is a deeper set of questions which need to be asked (and hopefully, answered) first. Questions such as:

*What are the risks associated with the process (i.e. the process of going to college)? What are the risks associated with taking out X amount of debt to pay for their college (risks for us as parents, risks for them as a young adult)?

*How can these risks be minimized?

*Who should be involved in making these decisions?

*How will we communicate with each other (parents, student, grandparents, others) about our beliefs, thoughts, feelings, observations – especially over time as circumstances in life change?

Now, let me offer some of my thoughts and responses to some of the questions.

First, I believe using historical data from the 70’s, 80’s, & 90’s to justify investing in college today can lead to erroneous conclusions. The world has changed. A college degree no longer, in and of itself, leads to higher wages or a more successful career. Take a quick look around you and note how much college graduates are working in entry level jobs not related to their field of study. (For financial types, this is similar to using past performance of a mutual fund manager to predict future success – it really depends on the manager, the period of time you are comparing to, and other market factors.)

If the degree is from an inferior institution (on-line “buy your degree” colleges, and some community colleges) or in an area with minimally marketable skills (how about a B.A. in“general studies”?), the time and money may be wasted. There are many ways to obtain skills and knowledge today not possible in the past, (including the Internet.) I have met many young entrepreneurs who are starting their own businesses in real estate, landscaping, construction, or buying franchises, who are not college-educated but who are being trained in alternative ways.

Second, as Thomas Friedman has written in The World is Flat, one of the areas of continued need economically will be service occupations that need to be provided locally. This includes many skilled trades (electricians, plumbers, carpenters, auto mechanics, home builders) for which a college degree is not the way the profession is learned. We have a major problem in our culture in that our educational system is biased heavily toward verbal skills and processing information. But there are millions of individuals who are talented in the visual-spatial, mechanical, mathematical, musical, artistic areas that are not being trained well – and there is already a shortage of these types of professionals in our country today.

Third, it is important to note that, for many, the purpose of college is not limited to developing a marketable career skill. Many also argue that the college experience broadens the person, exposing them to different types of people, different ways of thinking, and new life experiences that will shape them for life. I personally hold to this view – and incorporate this into the “value” I believe college brings to individual’s lives. (The more cynical viewpoint is: “What do I value about college graduates over high school graduates? They are usually older.”) Others (Bob Copeland in Ten Things Employers Want You to Learn in College) have written about the life skills that can be obtained through the college education process (for example, written communication skills, the ability to work with others, asking and answering the right questions.)

Finally, probably the most important issue is the factor is that young people today know virtually nothing about the world of work. They do not know what careers are out there and have only a cursory knowledge of what a professional really does (ask them about civil engineers, occupational therapists, actuaries or an insurance adjustor). The world of education and the work of work are largely in two separate universes today. And young people have little exposure to the world of work – either by working themselves or by seeing what their parents do.

So, in my opinion, (and I will be writing more about this) if parents want to help their children succeed in finding a career they should focus more on educating them about various jobs, careers and industries, and spend less time and money on SAT/ACT preparation courses and finding the “right” college. Where one goes to college is clearly secondary decision compared to having a general sense of one’s life and career direction.

Yes, college is expensive. But to answer the “is it worth it?” question, parents and students need to think through some more foundational issues first.

Given the time of year – early fall, with classes starting up at many colleges and universities – it is time for the media blitz on “the college question”. Different media sources frame the question in different ways.

Foxnews.com has had a series recently on the topic, including “Is college worth the money?” and “Choosing a College: Liberal Arts vs. Professional Training”. Time magazine’s August 21, 2006 cover asks the question “Who needs Harvard?” with a subtitle of “How to find the right college for you”. And there are numerous columns in newspapers addressing the issue (“How to fund your college education”).

The problem is – the questions are framed incorrectly.

No one can genuinely answer a global question “is college worth it” for all the individuals considering the question for themselves. The questions need to be framed more specifically:

*Is going to (insert college/university name here), taking X, Y & Z courses, a good direction for you this fall, given your current financial situation and your current career goals?

There are lots of variables that need to be considered:

-the cost of the educational experience (tuition, housing, books, food)

-how the costs will be paid (you, your folks, scholarships, loans)

-the quality of education and training you will receive

-your current career direction (do you have one?)

-your (and your parents’) values regarding education

-your (and your parents’) tolerance for risk (in this case, debt)

-what would you be doing if you didn’t take classes (work? play video games?)

The reality is – the answer is going to be different for most individuals, and even the same person at different times. However, I will offer one general principle with regards to career exploration (a fancy name for the process of determining “what am I going to do with the rest of my life?”). It is easier to figure out where you are going on a trip if you’ve seen a few places, and it is really hard to turn a parked car.

Generally speaking, I think it is best for people to choose to do something (take a class, go to school for a semester) than not do something. A pattern I am seeing among young adults today is the tendency toward passivity – waiting, putting things off – rather than taking action and being proactive.

I believe it is better to learn what you don’t want to do by having a negative experience than not to learn anything because you chose to do nothing.