This week I had the opportunity to attend a conference where both John Townsend (author of Boundaries) and Henry Cloud (author of Integrity) spoke on leadership.  Here are some notes of thoughts that I felt were interested and helpful.

John Townsend

Research is verifying the relationship between character, interpersonal skills and performance outcomes.  That is, if you work on the “inside” issues you will see improvement in performance outcomes. (See below for why this is the case.)

Life is more than making right choices – doing cost/benefit analyses.  There are two sets of information that leaders need to listen to – external (verifiable objective facts) + internal (listening to your ‘gut’).  True reality is a combination of objective information plus subjective intuition.

Values  — values are those things that you believe in to the point that they dictate your decisions.

Leaders need to focus less on what the mission statement says their core values are, and get an objective observer to share the values they observe in how the organization actually functions (i.e. focus on what their values are versus what they should be.)

The pendulum is swinging in leadership development from a pure focus on strategic planning, setting goals, managing by objectives, and the variety of technical processes to improve performance to also paying attention to the emotional side of life (and business).  Not focusing on feelings for feelings’ sake, but understanding that feelings play a role in both decision-making and in working as a team.

In decision-making, feelings play the role of relaying signals to the leader – signals that need to be paid attention to and investigated.  Anxiety (or concern or fear) is signaling that there may be a potential danger to heed.  Investigating the reality of the risk and taking steps to manage the risk (if it is real) is wise.  Ignoring the signal could be reckless.

Interestingly, Townsend indicates that the positive function of anger (irritation or frustration at lower levels) is an indication that you have a problem to solve – something is going on that you don’t like.  Now the problem may be internal – that you have unrealistic expectations that aren’t being met.  Or the problem may be external – that someone’s performance is not acceptable and needs to change.

A third emotion he cites that is critical to the business world is passion.  I personally have never considered passion as an emotion previously.  But it makes sense.  Townsend describes passion as “focused desire”.   And most successful leaders have or have experienced passion – that burning desire to do what they are called to.   A challenge for some leaders is that they lose the intensity of their passion / desire over time (which is a whole additional topic of discussion), while others struggle in maintaining the focus of their passion.

[Out of deference to Dr. Townsend and his intellectual capital, I am not going to list all of the positive and negative emotions he addressed in his book Leadership Beyond Reason:  How Great Leaders Succeed by Harnessing the Power of Their Values, Feelings, and Intuition.  Get the book – it is a good, solid leadership book with a unique perspective on the role of feelings in leadership.)

Townsend also believes that emotions play an important role in working effectively together with team members  — negative emotions among team members impede effective functioning, while positive feelings between colleagues facilitate better performance, both individually and as a unit.

He also describes the power of emotions in bringing to mind past relationships (what he and other psychologists call “internal relationships”) – those people who influenced us significantly in the past (parents, teachers, mentors, coaches) and still influence us “in our head”.  Dr. Townsend gives excellent examples of how leaders become stuck in their personal and leadership development because they can’t get past old messages from internalized relationships (“You’ll never amount to anything.”  “In the end, you’ll always screw it up.”)

A key application for me is that both Dr. Townsend and his colleague, Dr. Henry Cloud (whom I also heard) are seeing the need for coaching in the “middle space” for leaders.  There is plenty of coaching and leadership development in the strategic planning, becoming a change agent, etc. space.  And many leaders don’t need (or won’t get) heavy duty “counseling” focusing on personal problems.  But Dr. Cloud argues that there is the “middle space” that needs to be addressed – where a leader’s personal development has not kept pace with the growth of his organization and his or hers resulting responsibilities.  So there is a gap between the weight of their professional responsibilities and the development of personal skills and abilities to effective manage the demands.  Issues in this middle space include recurrent patterns of interpersonal difficulties (types of people you don’t work well with),  anxieties and fears that are making you hesitant to make decisions, personal and family  issues that are interfering with your performance by sapping your emotional energy, etc.  Business leaders need help working though these issues so that they can continue to become more productive leaders (which is the goal of the process).

One last interesting point Dr. Townsend  made about leaders.  Leaders are essential persuaders – they persuade others to follow them.  Initially, they do this by casting vision, identifying goals that will lead to the vision, communicating out a plan to reach the goals and then inspiring his team to share the vision and implement the plan.

But there is a difference between initially persuading followers and keeping them engaged.  For team members to continue to stay engaged with the vision and task, they need a sense of being listened to , understood and cared for by the leader.  This is a different skill set than the initial persuasive skills and many leaders either haven’t developed, don’t value or don’t practice the empathic listening to their team – and this ultimately leads to loss of enthusiasm, discouragement and conflict – for the unheard team member will find someone who will listen to them (other colleagues, other leaders) and this can lead to discontent and division within the team.

I’ll stop there.  “He who has ears to hear, let him listen (and act!)”

This week I have had the privilege of participating in a summit meeting of advisors who work with some of the most successful individuals and families in our country (and even the world).  Approximately twenty-five professionals from a variety of disciplines gathered to learn from one another and discuss how they can best work together to serve their clients.  Clients of the advisors present include royalty of countries around the world, former Presidents of the United States, top entertainers and sports figures in the U.S., leaders and innovators in the field of technology, “household names” of financially successful families, and generally very successful business families from various industries.

It was a fascinating two days of listening to presentations from the professional participants — who shared the latest advances in their field of service, and then to hear the team members discuss together the implications of the advances and how they can be utilized to help the families we serve.  The areas of expertise included:

*investment advisory professionals (one of the leading theorists in the field whose firm has outperformed the S&P 500 every year for the past 10 years)

*open architecture financial reporting (being able to report all of a family’s assets in one report — from multiple investment firms to including non-traditional asset classes)

*risk management  (an independent consultant who advises clients in assessing the various types of risks associated with their holdings and businesses and helps clients find the best provider for each type of risk)

*security of family members (a former intelligence agent whose firm provided security at the last World Cup games and who has successfully returned every kidnap victim safely)

*life insurance professionals (the ex-chief underwriter of one of the top five life insurance companies in the world)

*estate and tax planning attorneys (a team of attorneys who together train estate planning attorneys across the country and some of whom are involved in framing state laws in the area)

*business valuation and business succession experts (individuals who have been involved in helping transfer billions of dollars of business value from one generation to the next)

and more.

What was fascinating to me was to observe the following characteristics of these individuals:

• Humble.  Although each person was a leader in the own field, to a person they were not proud, arrogant nor self-promoting.
• A learner.  Each person was there to learn from others and people repeatedly commented on the privilege to learn from one another.
• Service-orientation.  These professionals saw their role as to serve their clients to the best of their ability.  Although everyone is also professionally successful, they were not focused on image or making a lot of money — they knew that if they served their clients well they would be fairly compensated.
• Collegial.  Although there were professionals from the same fields (e.g. accounting, tax law) as well as a variety of areas, there was no sense of “turf wars” or trying to take over areas. Rather, these professionals see and know the value of working together with others who are also competent.
• Integrity.  Repeatedly the issue came up that “we are not willing to do [x, y, or z] just to make money. We will only do what is best for our client.”
• Enjoyable to be around.  We laughed a lot.  The group was positive, caring for one another, and respectful.  I did not hear one cutting or sarcastic remark during the whole event.  And people genuinely expressed their appreciation to one another in numerous ways.

The group reminded me of an old proverb I have tried to pursue in my life:

“Do you see people skilled in their work?  They will work for kings, not for ordinary people.”

The lesson for all of us is this — do whatever you do well, learn and keep learning from others, and take the initiative to do what you can to be around those who are the best in their field.

A practical example: one of the participants who was younger (early 40s), but already extremely successful in his own field [he serves royal families in the Middle East], sought out one of the older participants and asked to be mentored by him stating “I’ll do whatever you need — carry your bags, sit in the corner and be quiet — I just want to be there, observe and learn from you.”

Share that perspective with your kids and junior managers.

This week I had the privilege of experiencing two tremendous demonstrations of teamwork — one in basketball, and the other in a music theatre production.

As I reported last week, I am a University of Kansas (KU) basketball fan. And my family and I enjoyed the experience of watching the game together this past Monday night. “Enjoyed” may not be the right word, at least not for the whole game, but the result created a magnificent celebration in our home. (It was one of those — this doesn’t happen very often in life so let’s enjoy it to the fullest!)

While much of the media attention has been on the shot made by Mario Chalmers in the last two seconds of regulation time (for those who don’t follow basketball, he made a long shot to tie the game and send it into overtime), but obviously the win was created by both a whole team effort and a series of events by a variety of team members. The combined defensive play on Memphis’ outstanding guards by Russell Robinson, Brandon Rush, Mario Chalmers, Sherron Collison allowed KU to stay close throughout the game. Darrell Arthur’s game leading 20 points, along with the inside play of Sasha Kahn, Darnell Jackson and Cole Aldrich wore down the big men of Memphis to the point of exhaustion. The steals by Mario and Sherron down the stretch provided the opportunity to score and catch up at the end of regulation. And obviously, the coaching by Bill Self and his staff gave the players the instruction and guidance they used to build and regain the lead.

In spite of Chalmers’ amazing shot at the end, the emphasis all year has been on the balance of the Kansas team in scoring, in rebounding, and in leadership in various games. The season and the championship game were a prime example of how excellent teamwork leads to success. (Since this is such a discussed topic in the mainstream media I won’t expand further here.)

But let me turn to a less well-known example - the production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat by the high school which my daughter attends. The school is relatively small (about 285 students) and there were 50+ high school students (plus about 20 elementary school students) in the production. What was amazing to me, as I watched the production “come together” over the past week, was the intricate synthesizing of numerous pieces into a unified amazing production. For weeks, the music department has been practicing the songs, the drama instructor has been “blocking” the scenes, the choreographer fashioned the dance steps and taught the chorus, costume designers created and made numerous costumes, while artists constructed the sets and scenery. Then in the last week, the “tech team” kicked into high gear — creating the lighting schemes and figuring out the sound systems. And then the drama and music directors integrated all of the pieces and players — with increasing polish each night — into a wonderful mutisensory experience of music, color and light, dance, humor.

Here are some pictures of Joseph, his brothers, and my daughter, Lizz (one of the narrators) taken by my good friend, Michael Bankston.

Both of these events were sources of joy to me (and others). And they were the results of countless hours of practice (not only in preparation for these specific events, but in the development of skills over the years) of both individuals and groups of people into the resulting product. And the comments by observers were the same: “Amazing!” “WOW!” “Can you believe it?” “Incredible.” “Outstanding.” “A once in a lifetime experience.”

The power of teamwork can be amazing — the culmination and synthesis of individual talent and skill, combined with creative and dynamic leadership, along with each team member being willing to follow directions and do their part, putting the purpose & goal of the team unit ahead of individual glory. And, interestingly, the glory which returns to the individual from being a part of the team, is greater than the person could have accomplished on their own.

Just ask Mario Chalmers.